ok it's 1:57 am, i am sitting here on my bed. lights out. my laptop in my lap. my eyelids feeling like cinderbloks. Even my creative writing skills failing me. i sit here now because of my friend who is pulling an all nighter. she is in south carolina. she is coming home tomorrow but she wants to sleep on the drive. so she needs to stay up now, so she can sleep later. But she can't stay up that long alone, so I'm helping her. we are talking about everything. but mostly boys. duh. it's like a sleep over. it's nesacary! haha. we mostly talked about how she asked out her crush and how she wants me to ask out mine. i told her that i don't want to, but i want him to know that i like him. but i don't want to tell him, but i want one of his friends to tell him. but i have to trust them. she offered to do it.
we decided that she'll tell him on msn, because it's easier. she's going to pretend that she is talking to me. she is going to say something like 'so laura do you still like _____' then like either wait till he resopnds or if he doesn't quickly be like 'oh damn, this is _____ wrong convo!!' then yea.. i'm sure I'll regret this in the morning. but i'd rather him know, than never know at all.. i think.. probably not. but i have to take risks sometimes right ?! :D . I'm so nervous. because i added him on msn too. so he might ask me about it later. well that's ok. i'll just say like 'what?! who told you?!' or like 'um.. what?!' or something like that and if he keeps asking i'll just be like. 'k well it's too late to lie about it now!' then if he's that slow that he has to say like 'so do you ?' i'll be like 'yea...' haha yea I'm just planing it all now!
I hope he likes me too, but i highly doubt it. but i hope he doesn't tell people if he doesn't. i don't want to add to my self embarassment at my school. if he doesn't like me, i don't really know what I'm going to do because the other person i could potentionally like has a girlfriend :( . so i'll be crush-less, thus making me still emotionally attached to my most recent crush/my current crush and driving myself insane about it until i find something better. yes, that's right, if you didn't already know i can't be crush-less. i always have to like someone. i don't know why. it just adds to the stress in my life.. i guess it's kind of like my own scientific notion.. haha well i don't really know what else to say, so i'll just stop writing. only 3 hours till i can go to sleep now :D haha
3:12 am
-xo Laura♥
Saturday, May 3, 2008
my eyelids grow heavier, but i'll stay up with you anyway!
Posted by laura xo at 1:53 AM
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3 comments:
Wow, always need a crush. I guess so. Oh well. Not much for me to worry about. Talk about drama, which I hate. Do you hate drama? Because I despise of it. One of my best friends was off doing something, I don't know what, but later that night, his step dad calls me asking if I know where he was. I didn't. I call David to work on putting together this web site (programming and the likes) and he said Cole (the first fiend I mentioned) was out with Casy, my ex, not answering his phone. Normally, I wouldn't care, but just during this past week, I was trying to talk to her again after having ignored eachother for 2 years. Guess not- fate has deemed it not. But what's that to me? Not like I have anything to look foward to.
oh. and yea i can't stand drama. i avoid it at all costs! if i hate someone i don't normally let them know. or i just don't talk about them and don't worry about what they are saying about me. it's all so superfical life is too short to even waste your time dwelling on it. people who have nothing better to do than start drama aren't worth the time and stress.
wow im suprised u havent mentioned our little bet ,scary though lol i hope that i dont lose i have till 1:45 pm monday but you not showing up to school might not help and that should post-pone it till atleast tuesday. xoxo-rebecca
(p.s im so gonna win that bet :P)
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